Being Present: Avoiding the Reactivity Trap

Here’s a concept that I’ve been finding really helpful of late.  It’s called “The Shelf,” and it’s the place where I can rest my “baggage” when I find that my buttons are getting pushed by something.  The best example I can think of is when I’m trying –  REALLY trying – to listen to something that my partner is explaining, and I find myself getting triggered.  The idea is that I go, ‘Aha!  I’m about to fall into the “reactivity trap.” I need to take “my stuff” and put it on the shelf, so I can be truly present here.’  It’s an active decision to not pay any attention to my own internal triggering.  Maybe later I can take it down and explain my side of things.  Or maybe I can just leave it up there  . . . ?

 Mike Misgen, LPC

Conversations for Connection:
Cultivating Community in the 21st Century

Hello and welcome to the RRC blog community! Now that we have launched our new website, we will be adding new and thought-provoking blog posts on a regular basis. Our aim is to bring a fresh perspective that will inspire you to see your life and relationships through new eyes. As this is an interactive blog, we invite you to join this evolving conversation, and become part of our growing online community. As our world becomes increasingly digitized, we risk the loss of deep, authentic, soul-nourishing connection. So how might we cultivate a sense of community in the 21^st century? Our hope at Relationship Resource Center is to provide many, varied opportunities for conversations that spark profound and meaningful connections. We encourage you to enrich this conversation, by adding your voice!

Subscribe to our blog.

(Click “Join the Conversation” for any blog post you’d like to respond to.)

In gratitude for being a part of our community,

The Relationship Resource Center team